It's Still All In The Balance!

Well darling, this is a fascinating situation! After all this time, we still don't really have a winner! I suspect a lot of negotiating between the various sides will be going on over the next few days and maybe then we'll have a real result. For the moment, though, it's impossible to predict and we'll just have to wait for a final verdict. For now, the big question is:

Will Dolly manage to prove to the Committee that I ate her special cake?

I'm so upset she's taken me to the Committee about it, I can't tell you. I hardly stole her cake at all, it's very unfair. And she's my Best Friend, or used to be! As I say, I'm so upset! Taking me to the Committee about one piece of cake!

As you probably know, darling, there are some very important men and women on the Committee. There's Mr Casanov, Benny Shooster, and of course Margaret, who runs the Home, is its Chairwoman, but in order that she absolutely isn't biased, her Personnel Officer and boyfriend Chichi sits on it as well. He's from the Dominican Republic, which I've got no idea where that is! But he's always very kind to all the ladies in the home, and very well dressed. He says he likes to buy 'the best quality everything' made by people with lovely labels, because he says then it doesn't feel bad against his skin (but he should worry! His skin's smooth as silk!). He's also Margaret's shopper because it turns out they can more or less wear the same clothes, even though, of course, they're different sexes and he's about twenty years younger than her (I shouldn't say it, but they've got the same size bust, because Margaret's as flat as a pancake).

Anyway, I'm so upset about this silly cake business! As you know, sweetheart, I normally cry myself to sleep, but I've not only been crying myself to sleep, I've been crying myself awake - and as a result, I've not had a wink of sleep! Thank God for the fish balls I've got on my bedside table - last night I frassed them and watched the General Election results show on the BBC; they do those kinds of things so well, it was almost as good as the Lottery show.

I'm still hoping Tony Brown will win the election once all the results are in later today, but it turns out I'm in a minority in the Home. All the old ladies love Nick Legg. In fact, during the election debate, Margaret had to switch the television off because a lot of the ladies were reacting so strongly to his policies that the chairs they sit in around the side of the room were scraping against the wall, and Margaret said she wasn't insured for that kind of wear and tear.

And no, still no luck on that stain in the bathroom, which gets bigger and bigger. I tasted it yesterday morning and it was a bit like fish food, but I don't have a fish! (only fishballs, but you don't have to feed them!) So where it comes from remains enigmatic in the extreme.